Socks are a great gift

Socks. Along with underwear, they’re the stereotypical ‘bad gift’ you get from your parents year after year. I’ve never really understood this cliche however. Because buying socks and underwear sucks! I’d much rather have it just come to me than have to go seek it out myself. Luckily you can get people to buy you socks every year if you want. Here’s how.

When I was in high school, my homeroom teacher was also the dance teacher. You weren’t allowed to wear shoes in the dance studio, so every homeroom class was us sitting on the floor in our socks. I thought “Well if I have to take off my shoes every day, might as well get some nice socks” because of course the most important thing in high school is lookin’ cool. (idk why I thought other kids would see my sick ass socks and think that was cool)

So I got myself a few pairs of socks. One pair had Van Gogh’s Starry Night on them, another had some tacos on it. And my perceived homeroom coolness was increased I guess?

But here’s where it really pays off. Because once you’ve established yourself as that person, you will continue to be that person every holiday. What does Robert want for christmas? Socks probably. And it’s true, I do. I haven’t bought my own socks in 6 years! I just get an infinite supply every holiday.

Socks are a great gift and I’m very glad to get them every year.