Tony Hawk’s very cool blood skateboard

At what level of fame do your bodily fluids become valuable? It’s not enough to just be famous. For example no one wants to buy Ryan Reynold’s sweat. That would be gross and unhygienic. You have to reach the level of fame where you’re not just a famous person, but a famous icon. Someone that anyone knows even if they don’t really know anything about the related subject matter.
That’s where Tony Hawk comes in. The birdman is obviously famous for being a very talented skater, and I would wager a good chunk of change that you would have a great deal of difficulty finding someone who doesn’t know of Tony Hawk. I would also wager the same that you would have the same level of difficulty finding someone who knows he was the first person to document landing a 900. He’s the level of famous where people don’t actually know the details right?

Which means he’s also the level of famous where people want his blood.

Like as a gimmick. I can’t vouch for any potential vampires who’d like to drink Tony’s blood. This is a thing about skateboards.

This week Tony Hawk announced a partnership with Liquid Death, which is a canned water company. They’re selling special skateboards which were painted, in part, with Tony Hawk’s actual real blood from his body.

Gross!

But also… cool. I’d buy the Tony Hawk blood skateboard. I don’t know how to skateboard, but I bet this would help. If I had a little piece of his blood and soul to guide me through the ramps, I wonder if I too could land a 900…